Children of God

GospelJN 1:1-18

In the beginning was the Word,
and the Word was with God,
and the Word was God.
He was in the beginning with God.
All things came to be through him,
and without him nothing came to be.
What came to be through him was life,
and this life was the light of the human race;
the light shines in the darkness,
and the darkness has not overcome it.

A man named John was sent from God.
He came for testimony, to testify to the light,
so that all might believe through him.
He was not the light,
but came to testify to the light.
The true light, which enlightens everyone, was coming into the world.

He was in the world,
and the world came to be through him,
but the world did not know him.
He came to what was his own,
but his own people did not accept him.

But to those who did accept him
he gave power to become children of God,
to those who believe in his name,
who were born not by natural generation
nor by human choice nor by a man’s decision
but of God.

And the Word became flesh
and made his dwelling among us,
and we saw his glory,
the glory as of the Father’s only-begotten Son,
full of grace and truth.

John testified to him and cried out, saying,
“This was he of whom I said,
‘The one who is coming after me ranks ahead of me
because he existed before me.’”
From his fullness we have all received,
grace in place of grace,
because while the law was given through Moses,
grace and truth came through Jesus Christ.
No one has ever seen God.
The only-begotten Son, God, who is at the Father’s side,
has revealed him.

The Word made flesh.  The Creator becoming one of the created.  I am one of God's creations - "born not by natural generation nor by human choice, but of God."  It's hard to imagine.  It almost sounds like a super hero origin story.  I am a child of God - precious, holy, loved, embraced, held in high esteem, blameless.

The whisper of God's voice

GospelLK 2:36-40

There was a prophetess, Anna,
the daughter of Phanuel, of the tribe of Asher. 
She was advanced in years,
having lived seven years with her husband after her marriage,
and then as a widow until she was eighty-four. 
She never left the temple,
but worshiped night and day with fasting and prayer. 
And coming forward at that very time,
she gave thanks to God and spoke about the child
to all who were awaiting the redemption of Jerusalem.

When they had fulfilled all the prescriptions
of the law of the Lord,
they returned to Galilee,
to their own town of Nazareth. 
The child grew and became strong, filled with wisdom;
and the favor of God was upon him.

I can't recall the story of Anna but she sounds like  what we would call a contemplative - worshiping day and night with fasting and prayer.  During these quiet moments of reflection, God must have communicated to her the real identity of the young Jesus.  In a similar way, I can hear the whisper of God's voice when I pray quietly.  

My safety and security rests in God

GospelMT 2:13-15, 19-23

When the magi had departed, behold,
the angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream and said,
“Rise, take the child and his mother, flee to Egypt, 
and stay there until I tell you.
Herod is going to search for the child to destroy him.”
Joseph rose and took the child and his mother by night 
and departed for Egypt.
He stayed there until the death of Herod, 
that what the Lord had said through the prophet might be fulfilled,
Out of Egypt I called my son.

When Herod had died, behold,
the angel of the Lord appeared in a dream
to Joseph in Egypt and said,
“Rise, take the child and his mother and go to the land of Israel, 
for those who sought the child’s life are dead.”
He rose, took the child and his mother, 
and went to the land of Israel.
But when he heard that Archelaus was ruling over Judea 
in place of his father Herod, 
he was afraid to go back there.
And because he had been warned in a dream, 
he departed for the region of Galilee.
He went and dwelt in a town called Nazareth,
so that what had been spoken through the prophets
might be fulfilled, 
He shall be called a Nazorean.

It looks like God not only eliminated the threat of Herod, He eliminated Herod himself.  Even so, the Holy Family were wanderers looking for a place where they would be safe.  That place was Nazareth.  During those times that I feel threatened the most, I can always count on God to deliver me to safety.  There are countless close calls when I know He has - a near drowning, a car accident that could have been fatal come to mind.  How many times was I under threat and didn't even know it?  God saved me in those moments as well.

Trust

GospelMT 2:13-18

When the magi had departed, behold,
the angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream and said,
“Rise, take the child and his mother, flee to Egypt,
and stay there until I tell you.
Herod is going to search for the child to destroy him.”
Joseph rose and took the child and his mother by night
and departed for Egypt.
He stayed there until the death of Herod,
that what the Lord had said through the prophet might be fulfilled,
Out of Egypt I called my son.

When Herod realized that he had been deceived by the magi,
he became furious.
He ordered the massacre of all the boys in Bethlehem and its vicinity
two years old and under,
in accordance with the time he had ascertained from the magi.
Then was fulfilled what had been said through Jeremiah the prophet:

A voice was heard in Ramah,
sobbing and loud lamentation;
Rachel weeping for her children,
and she would not be consoled,
since they were no more.

Jesus was born into a world of hatred, a world gone mad.  It's a minor miracle that he survived Herod's wrath.  The Holy Family was fleeing for there lives.  Not what we typically think of when we imagine the manger scene, the baby Jesus sleeping peacefully in the manger with the 3 wise men and animals looking on in silent wonder.  What is the deeper meaning here?  Mary & Joseph had a tremendous amount of responsibility - protecting and raising up the Son of God Himself!  It required an equal measure of faith and trust in God.  And God provided for them.  Time and time again throughout the bible, God finds us in our moment of greatest need.  Like Mary and Joseph, God has given me responsibilities.  And I can count on Him in my darkest moments.

The Greatest Love Story Ever

GospelJN 20:1A AND 2-8

On the first day of the week,
Mary Magdalene ran and went to Simon Peter
and to the other disciple whom Jesus loved, and told them,
“They have taken the Lord from the tomb,
and we do not know where they put him.”
So Peter and the other disciple went out and came to the tomb.
They both ran, but the other disciple ran faster than Peter
and arrived at the tomb first;
he bent down and saw the burial cloths there, but did not go in.
When Simon Peter arrived after him,
he went into the tomb and saw the burial cloths there,
and the cloth that had covered his head,
not with the burial cloths but rolled up in a separate place.
Then the other disciple also went in,
the one who had arrived at the tomb first,
and he saw and believed.

On a side note, I fractured my wrist while snowboarding with the boys.  Still trying to figure out how to type with a forearm cast that doesn't allow me to pronate.  Will need to keep my posts short and sweet.

So today's gospel reading is really not a part of the advent story.  It's the empty tomb story that we typically hear during the Easter season.  So I am to reflect on the 3 most important events to Christians: the birth and death of Jesus and His resurection.  That's a lot to comprehend!  Woven into these stories is God's love for us - for me.  That He loves us enough to become one of us and die for us.  What a statement about how much we mean to Him. Truly a love story like no other!

Advent and Easter

On the first day of the week,
Mary Magdalene ran and went to Simon Peter
and to the other disciple whom Jesus loved, and told them,
“They have taken the Lord from the tomb,
and we do not know where they put him.”
So Peter and the other disciple went out and came to the tomb.
They both ran, but the other disciple ran faster than Peter
and arrived at the tomb first;
he bent down and saw the burial cloths there, but did not go in.
When Simon Peter arrived after him,
he went into the tomb and saw the burial cloths there,
and the cloth that had covered his head,
not with the burial cloths but rolled up in a separate place.
Then the other disciple also went in,
the one who had arrived at the tomb first,
and he saw and believed.

I was surprised to read today's gospel reading. It is the empty tomb reading from lent. We just read about the birth of Jesus and in today's reading we fast forward to His death and resurrection. The contrast is striking. The Word made visible in the form of baby Jesus and the empty tomb suggesting that Jesus was able to conquer death itself.  Helplessness contrasting with the Son of God's sovereign power. What is the deeper meaning here?  That God is present in my life in the most unexpected ways, even where I might least expect Him. I am at my best when I see God in the weak and vulnerable.

Life isn't Fair

Jesus said to his disciples:
“Beware of men, for they will hand you over to courts
and scourge you in their synagogues,
and you will be led before governors and kings for my sake
as a witness before them and the pagans.
When they hand you over,
do not worry about how you are to speak
or what you are to say.
You will be given at that moment what you are to say.
For it will not be you who speak
but the Spirit of your Father speaking through you.
Brother will hand over brother to death,
and the father his child;
children will rise up against parents and have them put to death.
You will be hated by all because of my name,
but whoever endures to the end will be saved.”

Another post on my nexus.  What a shocking reality check!  We just sang Joy to the World at Jesus' birth and now we get the news that we will be hated!  Life isn't fair.  It's not all sweetness and light.  Life isn't always as it should be or as I want it to be. I will suffer and when I think it's over will suffer some more.  But this reading doesn't tell the whole story.  Even in my darkest moments, God is with me. God is faithful.

Baby Jesus

Now there were shepherds in that region living in the fields
and keeping the night watch over their flock.
The angel of the Lord appeared to them
and the glory of the Lord shone around them,
and they were struck with great fear.
The angel said to them,
“Do not be afraid;
for behold, I proclaim to you good news of great joy
that will be for all the people.
For today in the city of David
a savior has been born for you who is Christ and Lord.
And this will be a sign for you:
you will find an infant wrapped in swaddling clothes
and lying in a manger.”
And suddenly there was a multitude of the heavenly host with the angel,
praising God and saying:
“Glory to God in the highest
and on earth peace to those on whom his favor rests.”

OK, I' m on my tablet, so this is going to be a short post.  This is the Christmas story we hear every year.  Mary and Joseph get turned away by the innkeepers and end up in what I'm imagining is a barn - Mary gives birth to the Son of God and lays Him in a manger.  What humble beginnings!  No attachments to social status, wealth, or power.  A helpless and vulnerable baby.  I am at my best when I have no attachments to status, wealth, or power - when I recognize my own helplessness, God's power is made manifest.

Prepare His Way

Zechariah his father, filled with the Holy Spirit, prophesied, saying:

“Blessed be the Lord, the God of Israel;
for he has come to his people and set them free.
He has raised up for us a mighty Savior,
born of the house of his servant David.
Through his prophets he promised of old
that he would save us from our enemies,
from the hands of all who hate us.
He promised to show mercy to our fathers
and to remember his holy covenant.
This was the oath he swore to our father Abraham:
to set us free from the hand of our enemies,
free to worship him without fear,
holy and righteous in his sight
all the days of our life.
You, my child, shall be called the prophet of the Most High,
for you will go before the Lord to prepare his way,
to give his people knowledge of salvation
by the forgiveness of their sins.
In the tender compassion of our God
the dawn from on high shall break upon us,
to shine on those who dwell in darkness and the shadow of death,
and to guide our feet into the way of peace.”

In today's gospel reading Zechariah is talking to his son, John the Baptist.  It's a message that rings true for me and all of us.  We are saved.  Our sins have been forgiven.  God is compassionate.  He guides us to peace.  And during this time of Advent we are called, just as John was called in his day, to prepare the way of the Lord.  What are we saved from?  We are saved from our self-destructive habits, our self-sabotaging thoughts, our egos, our prejudices, our arrogance.  The list goes on and on.  We are forgiven for all of it.  God has never held any of my shortcomings against me.  I am at my best when I forgive myself and forgive others.

Fear

When the time arrived for Elizabeth to have her child
she gave birth to a son. 
Her neighbors and relatives heard
that the Lord had shown his great mercy toward her,
and they rejoiced with her. 
When they came on the eighth day to circumcise the child,
they were going to call him Zechariah after his father,
but his mother said in reply,
“No. He will be called John.” 
But they answered her,
“There is no one among your relatives who has this name.” 
So they made signs, asking his father what he wished him to be called. 
He asked for a tablet and wrote, “John is his name,”
and all were amazed.
Immediately his mouth was opened, his tongue freed,
and he spoke blessing God.
Then fear came upon all their neighbors,
and all these matters were discussed
throughout the hill country of Judea.
All who heard these things took them to heart, saying,
“What, then, will this child be?
For surely the hand of the Lord was with him.”

In today's gospel we hear about the story of Elizabeth and her baby, miraculous circumstances in there own right that were happening in parallel with the story of Jesus.  It appears that Baby John came out of the womb talking and "blessing God."  Sometimes God gets our attention in a pretty spectaccular way and our initial reaction is very often fear.  We are afraid of something that shouldn't be happening but it is, or we are afraid of the unknown, or we are afraid of what we don't completely understand.  How often do we hear in the Bible "Do not be afraid!"  It happens a lot because a part of the human condition involves being afraid.  God wants me to move beyond fear.  Faith overcomes fear.  Recognizing that God was "with him" [the baby I'm assuming] the neighbors went beyond fear.  More and more, I can move beyond fear too as I look for God's hand in things by going beyond my initial fears. God's hand might not even be clear enough to really see, but I can rest assured that it is there. 

God is with us

Behold, the virgin shall conceive and bear a son,
and they shall name him Emmanuel, 
which means “God is with us.”

"God is with us."  That's the assurance that we get in today's reading .  Four words that make all the difference in the world.  God isn't some detached All-Powerful mythical Presence that watches us from on high like we might watch a fish in a fishbowl.  He is with us, all around us, and during Advent we understand that he became one of us as Jesus was both God and man at the same time.  It's the ultimate act of relationship-building that would later become the ultimate sacrifice for us.  Father Thomas Keating has said:  "...under no circumstances can we ever be separated from him [God]. We may feel that we are; we may think that we are. But in actual fact, there is no way that we can ever be apart from God even if we try.”  And that's the Advent message isn't it?  God is with us.  Last night Marie and I went to a Christmas party with some friends.  All of us were Catholics (I think) and we started the evening off by praying together, grateful to God for having so much and setting the intention of God's presence among us.  Amidst the food, games, conversation and horrible karaoke singing, God was with us.

God keeps his promises

Mary set out in those days
and traveled to the hill country in haste
to a town of Judah,
where she entered the house of Zechariah
and greeted Elizabeth. 
When Elizabeth heard Mary’s greeting,
the infant leaped in her womb,
and Elizabeth, filled with the Holy Spirit,
cried out in a loud voice and said,
“Most blessed are you among women,
and blessed is the fruit of your womb. 
And how does this happen to me,
that the mother of my Lord should, come to me? 
For at the moment the sound of your greeting reached my ears,
the infant in my womb leaped for joy. 
Blessed are you who believed
that what was spoken to you by the Lord
would be fulfilled.”

The Advent story continues with Mary visiting Elizabeth, both women able to feel their babies "leaping" in the womb, both women now convinced that what was spoken to them would be come true.  What a great reflection of God's character:  God makes impossible promises to us - and keeps them!  Reminds me of a great quote from St. Ignatius of Loyola: "Pray as if everything depended on God and work as if everything depended on you."  I'm really good at the working part.  And the more I pray, the better I get at understanding that everything really does depend on God.  

Nothing is impossible

Behold, you will conceive in your womb and bear a son, and you shall name him Jesus. He will be great and will be called Son of the Most High, and the Lord God will give him the throne of David his father, and he will rule over the house of Jacob forever, and of his Kingdom there will be no end.” But Mary said to the angel, “How can this be, since I have no relations with a man?” And the angel said to her in reply, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. Therefore the child to be born will be called holy, the Son of God. And behold, Elizabeth, your relative, has also conceived a son in her old age, and this is the sixth month for her who was called barren; for nothing will be impossible for God.” Mary said, “Behold, I am the handmaid of the Lord. May it be done to me according to your word.” Then the angel departed from her.

In today's reading we hear the story of Mary saying "Yes" to God's invitation to be the mother of Jesus.  It's an impossible task that she could in no way ever be prepared for.  But she is a faithful servant ("handmaid") who surrenders to God's will and word.  How often do we pray "Thy will be done" when we say the Our Father?  Mary really meant it.  In life there are times when God calls me to be prepared and through my preparation we can handle perhaps more than than we thought.  Happens all the time for me.  Experience is a great teacher and over time I've become a better father, husband, and physical therapist.  I swam from Alcatraz to San Francisco by training in the right way.  And then there are the times when life has overwhelmed me - watching my father die from lung cancer, seeing my brother's lifeless body in his office., getting divorced, losing the house over our head.  These are the times when God simply asks me to follow Him and surrender to His will.  These situations seem hopeless but truly nothing is impossible with God.

My Rock

In you, LORD, I take refuge; let me never be put to shame. In your justice rescue and deliver me; listen to me and save me! Be my rock of refuge, my stronghold to give me safety; for you are my rock and fortress. In today's reading, the Psalmist sounds overwhelmed, distressed, and desperate. It is during these times when we take "refuge" in the Lord. Often there is no where else to turn. Others, even loved ones, trusted ones don't understand or disappoint us. But God is our "rock and fortress." What is the deeper meaning here? Sometimes we look for refuge in other things - I'm big on getting approval from others and can also be a controlling perfectionist. Approval and control become my refuge and they are poor substitutes for God's loving care. Embracing God as My Rock is something that comes easily in the midst of crisis, but an even better approach is to rely on God daily, even moment to moment. Taking refuge in God all the time is a great way for me to prevent a crisis.

Miracles

This is how the birth of Jesus Christ came about. When his mother Mary was betrothed to Joseph, but before they lived together, she was found with child through the Holy Spirit. Joseph her husband, since he was a righteous man, yet unwilling to expose her to shame, decided to divorce her quietly. Such was his intention when, behold, the angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary your wife into your home. For it is through the Holy Spirit that this child has been conceived in her. She will bear a son and you are to name him Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins.” All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet: Behold, the virgin shall be with child and bear a son, and they shall name him Emmanuel, which means “God is with us.” When Joseph awoke, he did as the angel of the Lord had commanded him and took his wife into his home. He had no relations with her until she bore a son and he named him Jesus. In today's Gospel we read about the Immaculate Concepcion. An angel appears to Joseph telling him that Mary will give birth to the baby Jesus even though they had not been together. I wonder how surprised he was to find out that Mary was indeed pregnant - was the angel's account correct in that Mary's conception was miraculous? Did he at least wonder if Mary was fooling around behind his back - this would be a much more reasonable explanation, after all. But Joseph was a man of faith and he choose to believe in the miracle. Was there a miracle that I chose to believe in today even though it would be easier for me to believe something else? Today I led one of our chronic pain groups in a meditation that involved awareness of the breath. Normally we don't think much about the breath - our body breathes just fine on its own without our attention. But when I experienced my breath and gave it my full attention, I was indeed watching a miracle - the miracle of my own breath, the miracle of a living, breathing human body. Truly a grand design from a Master Creator.

Becoming

But the angel said to him, “Do not be afraid, Zechariah, because your prayer has been heard. Your wife Elizabeth will bear you a son, and you shall name him John. And you will have joy and gladness, and many will rejoice at his birth, for he will be great in the sight of the Lord. He will drink neither wine nor strong drink. He will be filled with the Holy Spirit even from his mother’s womb, and he will turn many of the children of Israel to the Lord their God. In today's reading we hear about Zechariah who gets the message from an angel that he and his wife (Elizabeth, well beyond child-bearing age) will have a son who will later grow up to be John the Baptist. Even before John's birth, it seems as if the angel can see the whole breadth and width of his life in great detail ("he will drink neither wine nor strong drink"). John is pre-destined it seems to do great things. While I believe that we are a product of our choices can it also be true that we are pre-destined for God's purpose? Or did the angel merely plant the seed, the belief, in Zechariah that his son would do great things and this became a self-fulfilling prophecy. I think this can be true as well - we become what we believe.

Humility

Good and upright is the LORD; thus he shows sinners the way. He guides the humble to justice, he teaches the humble his way. Teach me your ways, O Lord. Pope Francis was asked "Who is Jorge Mario Bergoglio?" And he answered, "I am a sinner." What a humble answer. The Pope affirming his own shortcomings and accepting God's grace and forgiveness. God doesn't want know-it-alls, he wants followers who are open to being taught and being led. It is the meek who shall inherit the earth. But meekness isn't weakness. The meek, like Pope Francis, are secure in the fact that they are imperfect, vulnerable, and not in control. Humble people are not self-absorbed but put others first. Meekness and humility are holy traits. There have been many occasions where being meek and unassertive have served me well - instead of acting impulsively and saying or doing something I regret, meekness allows me to take a step back, develop perspective, and act deliberately and thoughtfully. It's time for me to embrace humility as a strength. By getting out of my own way, I can choose God's way.

Patience

Be patient, brothers and sisters, until the coming of the Lord. See how the farmer waits for the precious fruit of the earth, being patient with it until it receives the early and the late rains. You too must be patient. Make your hearts firm, because the coming of the Lord is at hand. I don't know any farmers but I do have a lot of respect for their patience, faith, and work ethic. Preparing the soil for planting, then planting, watering, weeding, making sure bugs don't ruin everything, praying for enough rain but not too much, harvesting. It's a lot of work with no guarantee that things will work out as planned. And then it's time to do it all over again. Farmers are men and women of great faith. The verse reminds me of a quote that I like: "The best time to plant a tree was 20 yrs ago, the second best time is right now." What seeds did I plant today? We went to Dante's swim team Christmas party tonight and as soon as we got to the restaurant, Dante was off with his friends - we enjoyed seeing him having fun away from the pool, away from the performance-driven pressure of a meet, just kids being kids. He didn't want to leave, even when it was time to go to evening service like we always do. So after giving it some thought, we stayed. Seeds were planted tonight - Dante belongs now, he's one of them. He's a Flying Fish through and through (our team name) and this will shape his identity (I'm thinking for the better) for years to come. Like a farmer he is going to learn through swimming the lessons of patience, faith, and working hard.

Recognizing the messengers

As they were coming down from the mountain, the disciples asked Jesus, “Why do the scribes say that Elijah must come first?” He said in reply, “Elijah will indeed come and restore all things; but I tell you that Elijah has already come, and they did not recognize him but did to him whatever they pleased. So also will the Son of Man suffer at their hands.” Then the disciples understood that he was speaking to them of John the Baptist. In this reading we hear about Elijah who in the Old spoke of the coming of Jesus - as powerful as his message was, the people just didn't fully comprehend it. Through whom did God speak to me to today? Was I really paying attention? What a great question! If I listened to God's whisper between the words of everyone I encountered today what would I have heard? I was at Dante's swim meet today for most of the day and the message that I consistently heard throughout the day, was "stay connected, get involved, make a difference!" I'm in the final stages of getting certified as an official for USA Swimming and my mentors were so grateful and supportive of me and all of the parent volunteers. God's message rang true through them: by volunteering at meets we make a difference in the lives our kids. I talked to two of Dante's coaches today and heard more messages of being connected. I hadn't talked much to coach Sarah before but she gave me a warm invitation to swim with the Masters group at our club, something that I've thought about before but never pursued. The message: connect with other swimmers at the club. And when I talked with coach Julia she had another invitation for me to consider: would I be interested in coaching some training rides for members doing the Tierra Bella Century Ride in April. The message: connect with other road bike riders in the club and if I bring Frankie along for the training rides, I can connect with him too! To connect is to love. As I go about my day I will continue to look for invitations to love.

Prosperity and vindication

I, the LORD, your God, teach you what is for your good, and lead you on the way you should go. If you would hearken to my commandments, your prosperity would be like a river, and your vindication like the waves of the sea; What a reassuring scripture passage! I like the idea of God leading me and teaching me. Granted, sometimes what may be for my own good may not always be pleasant! It's kind of like when my mom made me eat my vegetables - they didn't always taste great but they were good for me. And just like my mom did for me, I gave Frankie a small bowl of fresh spinach to eat with his chicken and rice tonight. He can thank me later. I had to look up vindication to be clear on its definition. Here it is: "to justify or prove the worth of" So there's a spiritual recipe for prosperity and worthiness: follow God's commandments. Thinking back over the course of our Sam Camp calls, these are two huge areas of growth for me. And that's why I think my 90-day goal is going to be so helpful. By reflecting on God's Living Word every day, I am rediscovering my own worthiness.

Answering God's call

“My soul proclaims the greatness of the Lord; my spirit rejoices in God my savior.” Mary said these words after the angle Gabriel came down to tell her that she would be giving birth to Jesus Christ. I can't even begin to imagine how she felt - an unmarried women giving birth to the Son of God! "Why me of all people???" she must have said in her head a hundred times. But she answered God's call and I admire her remarkable faith. Sometimes God will call us to make history like Pope Francis or Nelson Mandela or Mary, but more frequently, he calls us like a whisper in the ordinary moments of our day. How did I answer God's call today? I woke up feeling congested and thought I would try to get a sub for my 12 noon spinning class today. I'm glad I was strong enough to teach. There were two members in my class that were brand new to spinning and I like helping newbies get started and comfortable - any new class can be intimidating when it's your first time. So I walked them through adjusting their bikes, figuring out their power meters, and encouraged them throughout the class. They stayed for the entire class (which doesn't always happen!) and I admired their effort. Towards the end of the class, I introduced them to the regulars and we gave them a round of applause! I really wanted them to feel welcome. Who knows if they will come back, but in a small way, I answered God's call today. On a side note, I was given a bottle of champagne for Christmas from one of my regular members. Totally unexpected but very sweet at the same time. It feels good to feel appreciated - and this is yet another call from God for me to pay the appreciation forward to everyone in my life that helps me become the best that I can be.

Finding rest

Jesus said to the crowds: “Come to me, all you who labor and are burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am meek and humble of heart; and you will find rest for yourselves. For my yoke is easy, and my burden light.” So I looked up the biblical meaning of yoke to make some sense of today's scripture reading. Back in biblical times, farmers used to join the young ox with the old experienced ox with a bar of wood to train the young one. The old ox did most of the work while the young one pretty much went along for the ride. So Jesus is inviting us to join ourselves to Him, to connect with the Divine Presence and let Him do the heavy lifting. How was this true for me today? It's been a busy week. Our Clinical Psychologist has been on ed leave so I've been covering her responsibilities in our chronic pain group classes. It's something I really enjoy - a nice break from what I usually do (teaching meditation and gentle yoga or Tai Chi), but it's also been wearing me down. I put a lot of effort into my lessons and by the third day(today) I WAS TIRED. I didn't have a lot of time to prepare for today's groups so I had to do the best I could with what I had - I trusted God to find just the right lessons from my files (and Youtube of all places) And we ended up having some heartfelt discussions about happiness, stress management, and exploring all of the resources that are available to us if we are willing to look for them. By "letting go and letting God" I was able to lighten the load for myself.

Most things come and go, only some things are eternal

"All flesh is grass,and all their glory like the flower of the field. The grass withers, the flower wilts, when the breath of the LORD blows upon it. So then, the people is the grass. Though the grass withers and the flower wilts, the word of our God stands forever." Things in life to which I pay a lot of attention will be gone someday. My own body is in a state of gradual decline no matter how hard I try to fight off the aging process. Even my marriage is temporary - someday (I hope not anytime soon) one of us will die and the remaining spouse will be single again. I spend a lot of time at Kaiser in a job that I love but will someday retire from. I have a full-time title but I'm really a temp! So what are some of the things that are permanent? According to scripture, God's word "stands forever." That certainly seems to be the case. Many of the great religious books were written thousands of years ago and they are still going strong influencing generation after generation. But is there anything else that is permanent? I read in the paper today the depressing story of a an aide at my son's old catholic school in Hayward - she was arrested for sexually abusing a 14-yr old boy over a 2 yr period. I knew her, she also took care of Frankie and Dante when they were in the after school program. Whatever good she may have done in the past, she could very well be remembered for this incident. Maybe reputations are permanent - and if not, they sure take a long time to change and build up again once tarnished. How do I want to be remembered long after my body has "withered?" What am I doing today that will last long after I pass? How will I influence future generations? As I'm writing this, I'm rethinking just how important it is to be a good father for Frankie and Dante. The influence that I have on them for the short time that they are under my care will trickle down to their children and their children's children. Offering up my opinions and ideas at work can and do result in department changes that might be carried forward for a long time. Getting others on board for a monthly prayer service at church is a ritual that could continue well after I'm gone. As much as I like instant gratification, I am at my best when I think long-term: decades, lifetimes, generations.

God is looking out for me

Jesus said to his disciples: “What is your opinion? If a man has a hundred sheep and one of them goes astray, will he not leave the ninety-nine in the hills and go in search of the stray? And if he finds it, amen, I say to you, he rejoices more over it than over the ninety-nine that did not stray. In just the same way, it is not the will of your heavenly Father that one of these little ones be lost.” What a comforting message! During those moments (days? weeks? months?) when I've "gone astray" God is looking out for me to bring me back to the fold. God helps me stay on track - in all ways and all things. How has this been true for me recently? Since Thanksgiving, I've been overdoing it on sugar and starchy carbs - I like stuffing, baked goodies and sugary drinks like lattes. And it shows. My pants are tighter but more than that my energy levels plummet - I feel lazy, lethargic and in a mental haze (from being in a sugar coma perhaps?. But starting today I'm back to my usual eating style, no-sugar cinnamon spice tea, a big salad for dinner, oranges from our backyard, and carrot/butternut squash soup for breakfast AND lunch!

Holy and without blemish

"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavens, as he chose us in him, before the foundation of the world, to be holy and without blemish before him." This one is hard for me to comprehend. God considers me to be holy and without blemish and yet when do I ever feel holy? What does it even mean to feel holy? The guilt of regret, now that's a feeling I'm used to. But holiness - I needed to look it up to gain understanding. To be holy simply means to be set apart for a special purpose by God and following the way that God has laid out for me. OK, now holiness is beginning to make more sense. Yes, I am part of a greater whole but at the same time I am "set apart" because I have a set of abilities and talents that are unique to me. Holiness then isn't something that is reserved for the saints or the enlightened few but it's a state of being that describes all of us - it is a state of being that describes me. How was I holy today? We went to mass tonight as a family, like we've always done on Sundays for many, many years. My sons know that I will compromise on a lot of things, but participating in weekly mass is an important family ritual that we seldom miss. They just know that we will find some way to attend mass, even if we are on vacation. Sometimes holiness means choosing what to make a priority, what to make a habit.

The Kingdom of Heaven is at Hand

"Jesus sent out these Twelve after instructing them thus, “Go to the lost sheep of the house of Israel. As you go, make this proclamation: ‘The Kingdom of heaven is at hand.’" Yesterday was the first Friday of the month. It was time for the Contemplative Prayer Ministry to lead our monthly Prayer Around the Cross Service at church. On a cold and rainy night, 19 of us came to church last night to meet God in song, prayer, and silent wonder. Of course, there is the promise of heaven after we die, but this scripture passage reminds me that the kingdom of heaven is at hand right now. There were a lot of other things I could have done last night but instead I shared a slice of heaven with my family and friends. And that's what heaven on earth is all about isn't it? Being with people that I love and love me back.

Thinking in Harmony with One Another

"May the God of endurance and encouragement grant you to think in harmony with one another, in keeping with Christ Jesus, that with one accord you may with one voice glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ." How's that for a biblical principle: thinking in harmony with one another, glorifying God with one voice. It makes me think of an orchestra making beautiful music together. And it reminds me of our own mastermind group - 3 like minds helping each other discover the best in ourselves. Today at work, I led an orientation for 10 chronic pain patients who were starting a 5-week class in my department. They came as strangers (to me and each other) and I led them through some Klemmer-like exercises, we got to know each other, we laughed, some cried. After 2 hours, the imagined boundaries between us melted away and we became one voice united in the creative expression of our real selves.

God is wondrously present in the ordinary

"Take time to be aware that in the very midst of our busy preparations for the celebration of Christ’s birth in ancient Bethlehem, Christ is reborn in the Bethlehems of our homes and daily lives. Take time, slow down, be still, be awake to the Divine Mystery that looks so common and so ordinary yet is wondrously present." Edward Hays said this and he was right. So today I am reflecting on how God is present in ordinary things. Last night I was swimming at the club and lost my glasses somewhere between the jacuzzi and the men's locker room. I was hoping that someone would turn them in at the front desk but no such luck. I drove home and everything was blurry so I had to be especially careful. On further reflection about the experience today, I've come to realize how something as ordinary as seeing is a gift from God - one that I didn't truly appreciate until my vision was impaired last night. God has also given me the gift of looking into my own soul and connecting with the "Divine Mystery" within me. For this, I don't need glasses, I just need to "be stil, be awake." And by the way, I went back to the gym today to teach my spinning class and swim again - guess what I found in the sitting area next to the jacuzzi - my glasses. Some kind person found them and set them there for me. God is present in the ordinary kindness of a stranger.